A crazy little thing called love

Prelude: This is not a pro-feminist post and nor is there a giant chemical plant near my flat which discharges estrogen in huge amounts as a by product. And yes i am insecure of losing my Dude membership.

When we were children we were read Knight in shining armor, Cinderella and other fables which showed guys as the quintessential macho folks and women as demure young things with a thing for braid hair and poetry. When we grew up there were these romantic comedies targeted at the teens and we pretty much wanted to be a part of the enigma called Love.

Enter modern age, metro –sexuality and women liberation. I would like to paint a hypothetical chain of events.

Consider a situation, where a guy who is not a complete colon comes to the rescue of a girl in a corporate environment. Say the girl is having a hard time getting into the system and is being pushed out of the loop due to her gender [also directly proportional to her looks]. The guy helps the girl out and brings her into the team and slowly she starts to feel better.

Now the guy asks the girl out and they go around. The girl has a platonic relationship with the guy as it would be unwise to let him go as it would be blow back to her current position. A few weeks of fooling around and enter scene, a coffee shop.

Guy: After mutual exchange of intelligentsia, the guy tries to hit on her. He does it this way because, girls find guys who shoot from the hip to be crass and crude [No judgment here]. He says “I think i like you”

Girl : Sure, i like you too.

Guy: Exasperated as the girl did not get the innuendo blatantly blurts out “I mean i kind of have hots for you”

Girl: I don’t think so, i am sorry.

Guy : Distraught asks the ubiquitous question “But Why? “ .

Now the girl is forced into a corner where she has to come up with a really lame reason like “It is not you, it is me” etc… . And guys who lack a certain chromosome start to hurl invectives against the girl and accuse her behaving like a mercenary.The guy [and some prudes] would reason that the girl should not have gone around if she had no intention of saying yes. Well isn’t the guy equally asinine to assume the girl as a commodity?Especially if he thinks that; if he spends some he should get some.

The situation post this conversation might branch out into two ways, one he is mature enough to understand that the girl is allowed to form her own opinion [This is rare and is not considered masculine].

Two the guy assumes that he has to try harder to show his Lauu for her. Then the guy brings on a tirade of emotional hijacking by buying expensive gifts, being super lame and proving to her that he can be a jackass for her. At the same time he has to maintain that he is not physically interested in her.It like the age old adage “To get a loan, you have to prove that you don’t need one”.

Very rarely does the choice of the girl matters and i find it to be unfair. It was depicted to an extent in a movie [Vinnaithandi Varuvaya]. The routine of guy- does-everything-to-prove-his-love has been done to death in industry that even karan johar finds it cliched. I think that Love is a two way street . I also believe that there are no equals in a relationship; there is always a person who puts the other on a pedestal. The former tends to be a lesser equal in one of the following factors

1. Looks

2. Money

3. Emotional quotient [A term invented by the ladies]

And if some losers say that true love never dies and they will continue to love despite the other not reciprocating it, it is called obsession and the person is a masochist.There is no such thing as unrequited love, it is just bad luck. The depth of your affection is not directly proportional to how much you screw your life over a girl, it is just pathetic. As far as devdas goes anurag kashyap pawned the megalomaniac in sanjay leela bhansali big time.

A small note to ladies, please don’t abuse chivalry it is not a prerogative :).

Move on


8 thoughts on “A crazy little thing called love

  1. love is love no matter when what where it happen. love is you own business when the other one dont love you.it is ok to pay no gain

  2. Hello,

    Well, before I begin my commentary, I have two things to state. First, thank you for your feedback, it was interesting 😉 and do refer back to my blog for my reply/ retort! Second, this post is interesting, you have a nice crass and dry sense of humour 😉
    Now, do I agree with your take on love? I don’t. Love cannot be restricted to a kind. There are various kinds of love. If you have a pet, do you not love it? I love my dog, he is about as important to me as any guy I am dating.
    Now considering the situation you have proposed- are you really trying to tell me this guy “loves” this woman? It seems more of “I like you and I want to get to know you better” or “I think you are hot, I want to fuck you” ( this is more appropriate to this context.
    Lastly: Emotional Quotient is not a term invented by ladies on the contrary it was invented by some very extraordinary men http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_intelligence
    And, women’s liberation is not about the cosmo fun fearless females, and is definitely not a very modern concept!
    On the whole, I really liked the post, it is very witty and you have aptly caught the cultural warp that many of us modern indians experience! Just, quit the jargon, it would work better.

    • Thank you :-). My take was on media and pop culture which eulogized[s] unrequited love by depicting males as the victim and females as some kind of mercenaries. Where in fact it was nothing more than tough luck to the guy!

      Guys bicker about women as being gold diggers and schemers. I feel that men aren’t far behind, what women look in wealth men see that in looks and personality. When a guy says he wants an “understanding read (subservient) wife” he “Expects” something out of a woman to suit his needs, so a girl isn’t flawed if she wants financial security.

      Before you give me a hi 5. I possible bummer.I don’t support dark women crying wolf over “fair” ness. I say deal with it and if you want to change people’s opinion over their narrow mindedness. Think again, I doubt they are worth it.

  3. I did see your point, which was perhaps why I liked the post over all! I make no attempt to change anybody’s point of view narrow minded or otherwise, as it is about your personal realization of things! Anyway, my context of love was very different from this.It was my take on something I read and didn’t agree with. Yes, I do agree largely with your take on relationships in general. It is very apt. However, it cannot be a comparative to my post ( not because I think mine is great) but because the context is not at all similar. Further, I am not a critical writer, not because I can’t write critically but because I choose not to. I am more into imaginative pieces, which are not written as an argument.
    I didn’t commend your writing because I felt obligated to, but because I genuinely enjoyed reading this post. It is a fantastic satire on modern relationships and you aptly catch the cultural context of the modern society.
    This is shameless advertisement, but it will give you a fair idea of my philosophy and my style as a writer! And your feedback is valuable. 😀

  4. Hey,

    I totally overlooked the other comment you sent and therefore I didn’t understand the whole context of this reply. I apologize. So, I take back most of what I stated in the previous comment, now it seems all meaningless. Sorry 😦

  5. Good one.
    I like your take on relationships.
    It’s all become way too cliched, you know. And this post really gave me a fresh new way of looking at it.
    And it’s definitely not pro-feminist. 😀
    Keep up the good work.

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